Sneham is the Malayalam word for love. Within my first few weeks here, the hostel girls taught me how to say Nyan Ninne Snehikkunnu which means I love you. When I say it back to them I always opt for the more inclusive option, Nyan Nyingale Snehikkunnu which means I love you all. I finished Sherlock Holmes on Saturday so I started reading a new book that I was really excited about. It is called The Pilgrimage and it is the truthful account of Author Paulo Coelho’s walk on the Road to Santiago. The road is an ancient one with a rich history of past pilgrims. In the book, Coelho’s guide teaches him about the three words for love in Greek, philos, eros and agape. Philos is the love of friendship and companionship; eros is passionate, irrational, romantic love but agape is the love this guide focuses on. The guide tells Coelho that “Agape is total love. It is the love that consumes the person who experiences it. Whoever knows and experiences agape learns that nothing else in the world is important—just love. This was the kind of love that Jesus felt for humanity, and it was so great that it shook the stars and changed the course of history.” Just as I read this passage on Saturday, literally right as I read the word “history”, my door creaked open. Thirteen year old Saina walked in and gently placed two chocolates on my bed. She did this all in complete silence. I said thank you and she just nodded and walked out of the room. I sat on my bed with my jaw completely dropped by this perfect alignment of incidents. It was as if Saina had waited until the exact right moment to come in and give me this selfless display of love. At Austin College I studied the principal of love a lot. Eros, philos and agape were ideas that were ever present in my studies and were often on my mind. As someone who has never claimed to have “been in love”, I constantly found myself creating meaning in my relationships of philos. In other words, my love came from my friends, family and others .The “others” category is pretty much solely for my dogs. Haha. Eros is something that my studies told me was fleeting and totally captivating. Lasting relationships that begin with eros the feelings of romance fade a little and become more rooted in the companionship of philos. Agape, however, has always been a mystery to me. I have contemplated it, written essays on it, and have seen it dictated in my faith tradition, but I never thought I could know what it means to feel agape. I had labeled it as a feeling reserved for God, unreachable by our human hands. Coelho’s book finally put this concept into completely understandable terms for me. When we feel an immense love for the world, for our surroundings, and for our experiences, we are experiencing agape. When we feel we are about to burst with love for every living thing on the planet, agape is freely flowing through us. When we cry because we are so happy, we are living agape. When Saina put those sweets on my bed, I first felt that it was a funny coincidence, but then I felt this overwhelming bursting feeling deep in my chest. This description probably makes you worried for my health, but no it was not my heart, it was my soul. My soul felt completely full of love for every person, every plant, every animal, every bug, and every tiny little microbe of bacteria that is part of this world that I am living in. I prayed right then and there because I couldn’t let the moment pass me by. I couldn’t let it be a coincidence. So for me, this was a small miracle that filled me to the brim. I felt agape not from a grand gesture, but from a small sacrifice and a silent nod.
I was also filled with a huge sense of love on Sunday when I went to go see Nicole do her sermon at Mandiram. Her message was powerful and the perfect call to action for those of us who feel we are doing enough by performing our traditions. She reminded believers everywhere that we must fully commit to creating meaning through our actions. Communion is an act that meets me where I am each time I receive it. Fun Fact: I never in my life have rejected taking it. On Sunday, Communion felt like a real, full, agape filled sacrifice, which is how it should always feel. I hope to continue to find moments in which my soul can be productive through loving God and the world totally and completely. I also hope that my friends from all different types of backgrounds can relate to the struggle to find meaning and love in a world where traditions become stale and God’s love seems far from us. The love of God embraces each human being! Let’s act like it!
“Why do some people say that there is just one way to love you God and come to you? We are all a part of you.” – from “I Love You and Buddha Too” a song by Mason Jennings
AMEN
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